So, i havent been on here in hella long and i havnt posted a blog in quite a while so i thought that maybe i would just fill you in on some of the things that have been going on in my life lately. well first my ex-girlfriend cheated on me twice, get this, she fucked her ex-boyfriend twice while me and her were going out. and she come to me and askes for forgiveness, i was so pissed. so instead of taking it out on her i went up to jimmi's on my lil scooter and my paintball gun. i fucked his world up, lmao i had fun with that. you wanna know what she did, see heres the deal i was ova a celsies house right and shes laying in my lap and were have a good time then jimmi calls her, and immediatly i get mad. so baout an hour later me and her walk over to that little queers house and she goes inside to give him his "valintines gift" . and it takes about 20 minutes in there and while im outside getting all pissed off. ya so it seems that while she was in there she fucked his little scrawney ass! well you know what, easy come easy go.i gues thats what to expect out of a girl that puts out after two weeks of goin out. i never should have fucked that bitch.

I as in me is gone I have erased him. It is that simple yet odly complex... You see for all my life, or at least as long as I can remember, I have been afraid. Always afraid of something, always! But I have taken that fear out of me, or out of I, me should say. This makes no sence and that's the point. I am locking I in a room that it cannot escape. It will live or die there until I find a solution to it's problem. I will not let I live in me and corrupt the little sanity I have left. Now that I have decided to erase him it has made me aware of how sheltered and secluded my life has become...I am not sure of how this happened or why but I will find out and make sure that this little mistake is rectified. But as you can see that won't happen! You are wondering now what the hell you are doing reading some physoco's insane little journal. Well this is what you are doing. You are grasping a new concept. You are realizing that not everyone thinks like you. You do not have to live a life of poverty and suffering or death. You can expand your horizons to include many endless possibilities. You are in control. Do not ruin this chance to live outside your "comfort zone". You must grasp this opportunity to escape your feeble mind and change the world! This is all I have to say, interpret it how you must but remember that there is not a wrong way to.                I think differently than you do.  It is quite obvious.  Have any of you ever noticed the difference between me at school and outside of school?  Well if you can't tell, there's a big difference.  When I am at school, I worry, all day long.  Do you know what I worry about?  People.  What they think of me.  What they will say to me.  If they think I am gay, or dorky or dumb.  I change every time I step into that school, every time.  I want people to see me, the real me.  But what if I show it and they freak out?  I know someof them might.  They already do.  So I get stuck fitting in to someother me.  A me at times I hate.  I think he sounds so dumb sometimes, just trying to fit in and act cool.  They way he acts, the things he says.  It drives me insane.  So then I am not in school and some from school sees me and comes up to me.  I'm not the person I was yesterday, I changed the second I left school.  But they don't know that.  I think about all of this every day.  I can't figure out how to stop I've tried to find a way to stay like I was before I opened the car door and steped out, but it doesn't last.  I wish it would I wish I could keep that side of me.  But it drifts farther away the less I am back with it again.  Which is mostly on the weekends now.  I wish I could stop it.  But I can't.  Somethings you just cant change.  Too bad.

Goodbye for now...

 i fing hate being like this, thinking the way i do and acting this way. i just wish i had someone to confide in, but no!!! it seems like everyone i care about is drifting away. not to mention the fucking shit with my parents!! omg  i just wish that things would go back to normal and i could just... be normal, not thAT THERE ENEV IS SUCH A THING AS NORMAL!!! well thats whats wrong, o and not to mentionthat the one person i though that i knew stabbed me in the back. i just wish they would all leave me alone!!! i dont know what to do!?!?!?! i like this girl mikayla and she used to like me as well, but for sum reason she stoped talking to me, she wont tell me what i did or how i can fix it. i miss her terribly! the way she used to look at me, the way she was there when i needed her. omg this sucks!

well, writing this is almost bringing tears to my eyes so ima stop.

Much luv to all

Michael Moore